Week 22 Feed back to one student can help you as well

Here is an example of feedback from Ms Keus to one student.  It is detailed and could help everyone with their last revision of report.

1) Your goal paragraph is unfocused and in past tense. It reads more like an “abstract” than an introduction. It needs to be in future tense and you need to state what your goal is and how you hope to achieve it
2) You have not listed your guiding question
3) You need to define your AOI more clearly
4) Specifications aren’t always clear
5) Selection of Sources has no in-text citations (which means you aren’t allowed to have a reference list, since they are matching pairs)
6) Your description of sources is vague because you don’t evaluate specific sources, but rather just talk about general genres.
7) You have off-topic sentences (e.g. talking about getting books when you should be evaluating books)
8) Your application of information section is too small
9) Your reflection on learning section meets only 1 of the 3 criteria descriptors – You have not reflected on your learning or on your AOI
10) Your reference list has incorrect information. You have not added authors’ names and dates even when they are readily available.
11) Appendices need to be finished


Please try to have your introduction presented to your supervisor before Tuesday of Week 9.

A strong Introduction includes:

a Brief context leading to selection of topic

the expression of a clear  goal and a brief explanation on how you intend to achieve it

Selected focus of one AoI

A description of product

A list of specifications

(250 to 400 words as a standard introduction)


The Process

This is about the creative process, but can easily include research. The process you go through with the PPP is an extremely iterative one that takes you along many different journeys. You may have already encountered this, but below is an excellent infographic which depicts the possible “states of mind” that you might go through! Where are you on this right now? Just remember, it’s normal!



Introduction of the report

A quality introduction:

Contains a brief description of the context leading to the selection of the topic.

– A clear stated goal

– A research question

– One appropriately selected Area of Interaction

– A list of complete and rigourous specifications

Note: See Student Guide on Page about Criterion B: Define the goal